I am complete, and so are you. We are two perfect little creatures on an insignificant planet out in the galaxy, chained to our grounds by imaginary concepts created by imperfect old creatures. Our timelines run parallel on different 3D planes. Our motive is clear, our propose is irrelevant, we’re not here to become one, we’re here to become two.
We are complete.
H.Q.
2:46
Thursday, 5 March 2015
Ever had to carve out a piece of your heart and set it on the shelf, until its rightful owner comes back from the dead.
This isn’t for you, but it’s in your memory, for I have waited for you, and I have waited for them, but for her I shall wait until the end of time.
Happy birthday.
I’m looking for a face, a face that I know well, a face that I lost and can’t be complete without. I’m looking for a face behind which lies a different soul. A face at which sight my whole existence ceases, and with a look from them eyes returns from the dead.
I’m looking for you, whom I cannot call, for I know not your name.
H.Q.
18:50
14/04/2014
I want to fly… I need to fly… I’ll be the second of the three, and in endless skies we’ll hunt, we’ll kill, and as one we’ll die.
A squadron of mad dogs; nameless, faceless, known not by a given number, like you all are, but by the number of lives we harvest, the number of rockets fired and rockets hit, the number of seconds before impact, and the seconds left before our one last collision…
Alpha to Charlie, Bravo is down… I repeat, Bravo is down…
God kid… It’s snowing as if it doesn’t want me to ever leave… It was snowing since 20:00 yesterday… then never stopped but for minutes; only to bring more snow and cover the whole town… I really wish you could come here… Right Now… I’ve never seen such beauty since 1992…
Suddenly all your childhood memories come alive on a fragile white stage… Weird, how a deaf cold layer of crushed ice could bring such warmth to the heart of a dead crow.
H.Q.
12:51:00
30/01/2008
And still the rain comes down to wash all our sins… 14 hours nonstop… And we’re yet unclean.
Maybe water isn’t pure enough… Maybe God should’ve used fire…
H.Q.
2:50:41
21 Nov. 2007
I’m sorry Raven… I’ve passed your words to someone who shouldn’t have known of them… But it’s not easy…
I’m sorry…
Those words shall now be sealed, if they are to ever be spoken again then it shall only be when they’re given back to you…
I’m searching in my daydreams for the future of your reality, and all I see is blood, mutants, shattered faces trying to keep me away from the truth… I don’t trust them, I did never trust anyone but those in black feather….. I’ve got the scrolls, the old texts, they’re safe in me…
Take me out of here
… Is when the mind decides to take the lead.
Emotions interweave with a momentary loss of vision, as they draw paths of their own, swerving away from a destination once set by a knowing, all-seeing, conscious mind; on which it struggles not to drift astray. But then you try to push it and then push it more, and ultimately fall into a sudden wake of the self, it leaves you out there, emotionless, a naked mechanical skeleton exposed to the eyes of a species to which you’ve never belonged. And then you try not to lie, for you have meant no harm, but end up doing more harm than what your lies would’ve caused, you try to use logic, for now the brain is master, but you find out that those who demand it are those who are hurt the most by it. So now you’re standing there, not knowing what else to do, for in every move you do you’re breaking wings, in every step you make you’re shattering mirrors, and in every word you say you’re disfiguring faces once ablythe; and now you’re dubbed a beast, a catastrophic mess of an unholy creation, for you have succeeded to ruin every beautiful thing you’ve ever cared to keep, and break every precious soul you’ve ever wanted to please, and no matter how hard you try to make it right, your words are failing you once more, choosing to add more to the misery you’ve never meant to create…
And then you wish that everyone was as simple as you are… I am here, and I won’t go nowhere… I tried, and I tried more and yet I failed again… I am what I am, a defect miscreation of an imperfect God, take me for what I haven’t chosen to be, and I would promise you nothing, nothing but an everlasting memory in a dying brain, nothing but a promise that you would be left unquestioned once you’re tired of this old owl, nothing but a fluctuation of anxiety and sudden bursts of manic laughter, nothing but a few smiles and a lake of tears, nothing but an honest word that would hurt you and hurt you again if you don’t give up this selfishness of a human nature and instinct-driven canister of selfish genes… I’ve never demanded a single thing from an alien soul, and I never will, all I had to offer was this chaotic mess I am, I don’t belong to anyone, I don’t belong to any place, I’m only alive for I know I’ll soon be dead, and that’s where I truly belong…
Until then, I am here to stay…
H.Q.
12:37
Sunday, 23 October 2011
For “WE” are the ones crying afar…
Our swords are made of words, words that wounds not the deaf…
We have no wings nor have we got them rides…
Our Valkyries are frozen tears, drying up at the heat of blazing cannons…
Our horses are dreams of a stillborn hope, slaughtered at the altars of filth and greed…
Death is only real for we have chosen to embrace it, but for them…
It shalt not be but an eternal shame and an endless pain beyond the seven depths of Hell…
Then for those it is but a wish… For death now hovers above headless children and towerless temples… The smell of flesh and the warmth of blood only draws a nearer end for the slaughter…
But Death serves not the fearless souls of the free, for the blade of the tyrant aghast he obeys…
Death comes to him who fears him not… And him we all shall praise… Glory to the dead…
H.Q.
01:30
Mon 01/08/2011
A dead doll on my floor… A chaotic resemblance of an infernal sparrow… It bleeds triangles over an alien womb… I stare hollow into the flat void… And I wait…
What have I done wrong?…
And now you’re awake…
No one can see you, they’re only receiving whatever light is reflecting from your hollow outer shell, they just cannot see through you, for you’ve been trapped in the darkest of all black holes, blackened beyond the deadliest of all blacks, the deafening silence is crushing you in beyond the void.
You try and scream for help, but your lips are sealed dumb, only you can hear the choking cries being slaughtered behind your deceiving smile. They smile back at you and leave you to your agony, as you retreat, falling back to the shapeless state of the imprisoned soul you are, eagerly awaiting the advent of the Angel of Decease, to set free your heart besieged.
And still you wait…
H.Q.
19:30
Friday
28/01/2011
I’ve never looked down at myself, for I am always in the same level with me… I am what I couldn’t give, what I couldn’t say, what I couldn’t be… What “I” is now is nothing of what I’ve dreamt, is nothing of what I hoped, is nothing of what I knew… What “I” once was is just a 26 years of beautiful abomination, of pleasant abhorrence, a rented shell for a trespassing soul… I am not the face I see, nor am I the voice I hear… the trapped mind behind these blackened hazel eyes is eager to leave this deceiving prison of flesh and lies… I am not what you all want me to be…
H.Q.
12:27
Sat. the 04th of Dec. 2010
Cursed be the ones who made me leave you beautiful two… and leave my family, my friends, and everything I held dear back home….
I pray this holy night for them to get the worse, for they have broken families, hearts, and smiles of best friends, ruined lives and futures, and ruined all that hope once meant…
I swear, and God is my witness, that they shalt rot on this Earth before they’ll meet the worse to come in their afterlife… Damned for all eternity, for they have taken a life away, they have taken the life of him who forgives not… If God has mercy, then he shalt hold it back from those who deserve not his mercy, for they have killed the souls and left the hollow bodies of us thousands to wander aimlessly under alien skies…
I pray for them to suffer a lifetime for every moment we missed a loved one, to bleed dry tenfold for every tear we’ve dropped, for I can feel no mercy for them who’ve grown nothing but hatred, greed and envy in their black hearts, or whatever carcass is left of it …
H.Q.
21 August 2010 at 21:18
Collecting dust, wind, and second-hand, pre-owned garbage bags…
Got myself one nice offer; a dog-headed god offered me a plastic bag with my head in! “In exchange” he grinned “I shall have some… TWENTY FIVE YEARS worth of memories!!!”… I couldn’t refuse such an offer, it was, literally, a no brainer; for my head, after all, was in the bag!!
So he handed me the bag, and took away the memories… I was happy, it was the first time I see me face to face! So I threw the head in the trash, and made me a nice plastic raincoat!!!
But it never rains here, not under his sight… in this endless desert, it will never rain… Not until you find your way back into this little cage of mine…
H.Q.
Sun 13:41
May the 16th 2010
:Edit: by H.Q.
Thu 23:52
May the 20th 2010
… I would’ve loved to die now.
I don’t want to see you fade… I don’t want to watch you die…
It might’ve been for the best; the way you left, dead or alive, it won’t make a difference, you’re gone either ways…
All I know, is I have this image in mind, this perfect smile…
But maybe, after all, I was just the perfect illiterate not to read within your words, I just know it was all a very big misunderstanding to start with… but come on! The only reason I’m still alive, is that I misunderstood the whole thing… she was a messenger… she just delivered what she had for me… a soul… just like everybody else…
And later, they all had to leave their own way…
God, don’t you think it would’ve been nicer if you did it all old-style? Why couldn’t you just make it all built-in the moment I opened my eyes to this waste of a world?
A soul, a meaning and a heart… they were given only to be taken back… do you really have something to prove? I don’t think there’s anything for me in it, so maybe it’s something for you, to prove to the all-mighty self of yours?
Yep, I know it’s been some time since we last talked, I know, me so busy, you just, not being there, all the time… or is it just cause I didn’t really need you? Is that how we evaluate things? Need?
Distracted, chaotic, purposeless, skinny shade of grey… only getting skinnier… and hopefully closer to an end… Can’t you just “undo” a creation? I’ll be glad to be your guinea pig!! Am I not but one anyway?
I’m done…
H.Q.
06:09
06,March, 2010
I am the grey…
I am the human canister in which the opposites unite, deep within my vacuum core words have lost their meanings, and definitions are yet to be defined.
Life is a statistical peak in chaos, and death is the norm, good and bad are relative to the receiver, while right and wrong are relative to the one who gives, love and hate are one, black and white are none, night is the only time when you can see the unlight, and darkness is the only state in which you see beyond the illusion of the eyes.
I exist, even if you can’t see me now, just close your eyes and jump beyond the space, beyond the sane edge of the mortals, hold your breath and dive deep into me, down into the void of all colour, the silence of all light, down, into a darker shade of grey…
… and the grey is I
H.Q.
13:45
12th Jan. 2010
Tears fall as hail from a pregnant cloud, washing down the blinding dust off your soul… You’ve seen it there, a rising sun on a different horizon, the same grey tone on an alternate sky… It’s never been there, it’s never been yours…
You choke on your tears, on your own smile, the sterile streams racing down your cheeks are the only thing real, everything else fades within the grey feelings of your other self, it blends into the grey mask facing the world you’ve never known, as if it was drawn into a dream that’s not yours…
You miss the days when you once cared; for life was lost the moment you stepped up to the sky… your soul is still waiting there; waiting on a deserted runway, waiting for the return of the Hawk…
But the Hawk’s wings were broken since the elusion of the Black Raven…
Hey, You, Black bird…
Bring me back my Sun… Bring me back my shade…
Broken, Blind and Lost…
Too soft, too ugly, too useless… the least deserving, the ultimate fool of fools…
Nothing has changed… You’re only tired of breathing…
Come back Black bird…
H.Q.
18:17
30th Sep. 2009
It’s quite shocking how simply and easily we lose the ones we love… In a moment they’re there… the second, they’re gone for no return…
When you feel you’re happy, and you have every one around you, don’t save your words for another day… as for some, this day will never be…
and you thought it could never happen to you… well, we only learn from our mistakes… but we’re never given the chance to make a use of what we’ve learnt…
R.I.P.
To All Once Loved…
I wish I had nine lives, I would’ve given you eight, and kept one for me…
But all I have is this sorrowful one… Would you take this one and set me free…
3 years 2 months and 13 days…
Colours have died and sight is withering since the parting of light; colourblind I wander through the grey, stuck between them two worlds, the white of joy, and the black of eternal rest… Only you can save what’s left of me, just choose your colour, and give in a proof… a proof of life… or a proof of death… and don’t you worry, as it would barely make a difference anyway… as all I need is a one-word answer…
Wakey wakey!!
Li’l bunny is gone to work, no banking today for ugly bunny.
Baaaad Bunny 🙁
Especially when they’re taken out of their place!!!
If you think that “Ignorance is bless”, then please drop by for a visit at my workplace! It is NOT easy to be one of the very few “literates” in your field, whatever that is, to be one of the few who have more than a spinal cord and a cerebellum, one of the few who actually know the meaning of the words they type… if typed correctly!!
so now, after googling “Cerebellum”, please, go read something… I’m really tired of repeating my question for a billion times in 7623487 different ways, only to get an answer, with more words and less meaning than what came before…
Please, once you find out what you want, try to give some meaning to your words… maybe then, you’ll learn how to save the 8 days gone wasted ONLY because you don’t really know Where you belong or what is your REAL job!
Enough said, back to work…
H.Q.
You’re scared… YOU ARE scared… disgusted… worried? Maybe not…
Dreams are flattened, hopes? Delayed… you’re not sad, neither do you seem to care, not even care… to continue thinking about how you’re going to finish this sentence…
Too many things that you regret, you can’t stop thinking, as if thinking is going to change anything…
Do they even care to remember?
Chaotic, as usual, but with uselessness… chaos has never prevented you from being well-organized, in a chaotic way, maybe, but still organized… there was a time when you could take full advantage of each single second you spend… but now… you’re even failing at enjoying the waste of the days…
Erasing…
Sealed, for a later use… hopefully…
H.Q.
13:24
Tuesday May 6, 2008
Yes, I have a heart of stone, and it’s solid, deaf and blind; that it’s so hard to carve your name in it… but once you do…
…You’re forever there to stay.
– The UnderLost – Misanthropy says:
what if… you’re just too tired to set things right again… you just don’t care anymore… or only tired of over-caring… it DOES mean too much to you but… it really isn’t worth the time you’ll spend to bring it back on track… paying for a mistake that you havent made.. always forgetting, ignoring and forgiving the other’s mistakes, while they dont even care to know what they hav done wrong
– The UnderLost – Misanthropy says:
they forced themselves into your life, and now they’re forcing themselves out…
– The UnderLost – Misanthropy says:
THAT, leaves an uncorrectable error in you life…
– The UnderLost – Misanthropy says:
i’m like… halted…
– The UnderLost – Misanthropy says:
all plans gone blank… future is hollow… living each day not knowing what you have to do… not being able to think of tomorrow…
– The UnderLost – Misanthropy says:
i’m going to blog this…
– The UnderLost – Misanthropy says:
06:37
Monday
27/08/2007
– The UnderLost – Misanthropy says:
H.Q.
Q: Why am I so miserable?
A: Today I was virtually hugged by a virtual stranger..
B: Strangers cannot be virtual; they ARE strangers!
A: Yeah… right…
B: So, you we’re “virtually” mugged?!
A: Do you mind?
B: Well, yeah!! …. Usually…
A: !!!???
B: What!!?
A: JUST MIND THE &*%@#&^%@ OFF!!!!
Q: Why do all Melissa’s come with the “Sweet” prefix?
Q: Why do I ALWAYS have to get disconnected a billion times an hour?!
H.Q.
19:55
July 1, 2007
how bad could it be, when you can only feel what you really are, what you really mean, through the sacrifice and pain of others whom you really love… still calm… hiding into deeper sleep…
H.Q.
29/04/2007, 09:48
Jealous… of one, of him, who does not deserve all the chances he has got… the unworthy… the laziest… of him who thinks he knows everything, but doesn’t… I don’t envy him, neither him I do hate… but he’s just my living proof of the un-just Godly created Earth…
H.Q.
27/04/2007